He says, his eyes
piercing through mine.
How could I stay the same
When I have felt his soul
and my heart intertwine?
I wish I could leave
my emotions behind.
I do not reply
but I want to cry:
“I shiver every time you touch my skin,
Although, it’s usually by accident.
you talk all about how your date went
and you expect me to sit there and grin?
To encourage you to destroy me
While you and I both deny
our incomprehensible chemistry?
you don’t miss when my knees were on the floor
I see you lick your lips when you enter my door.”
He sighs, “You’re so cold”
-No, I’m just too old…
Too old to waste my life on this.”
He walks away, I blow a final kiss.
I am forever changing, it’s what humans do;
So, this is the last poem I will waste on you.
You played me like a guitar string
your nimble fingers sliding down my spine.
Listening to the sweet sounds escaping
from my open mouth; our souls aligned.
But soon enough, you tired of the music
and longed to experiment.
So you put me down, threw out the pick
to try another instrument.
I heaved a sigh as I watched you leave
my heart still vibrating against my sleeve
hoping, in vain, that you’ll come back and play
but the melody faded as you walked away.
There is something about humans
Who are so unapologetically themselves.
So at home in their own skin
Unperturbed by others’ opinions.
They speak with effortless eloquence;
Their demeanor radiates confidence.
When I meet such rare specimens
I fall, almost immediately.
Sometimes, they notice me.
But my words escape as a whisper
Of myself, I am only a sliver.
They usually notice
Before I try to insist:
I was not always like this.
And as assuredly as they appeared,
And I am left with more fragments
Of myself to pick apart.
Late nights, when I am in the shower
I allow my thoughts to wander
Your face returns, my heart surrenders
To your expression at our last encounter.
The one whose eyes enslaved me many moons ago
The hurt within them buried beneath their glow.
You carried me during the darkest days
but even you could not bear the weight.
the chains grew loose from your unperturbed gaze
By the time you noticed, it was too late…
The tears intermingle with water;
when I fled, you did not falter.
Our ending need not be explained.
Love lost is but wisdom gained.
Someone on the bus today
Smelled like you.
Of cognitive dissonance.
I was at once
I used to associate
Smell is the most ancient
How I wish
I could eradicate
From my memory.
Two years ago today
our breaths intermingled in the snow
Vapour escaping our mouths
All of you, I wanted to know.
Your smile reflected
Against the winter sun
Warm and captivating
I thought you were the one.
We laughed as
Our warm bodies intertwined
I wanted to make you mine.
Our hearts yet unscathed
by imminent tragedy
We devoured one other
But you took all of me.
My cravings for you were insatiable
You infiltrated my brain
Escaping from you was impossible
Thus commenced the pain.
Two years ago today
Our souls broke the ice
But on this cold November night
Our love paid the price.
Between feeling completely empty
And drowning in emotionality.
On the bad days
Sentiments dissipate into numbness
I become a floating, barren body.
On the worst days
My mind is bleeding memories
I recollect his arms enveloping me
I cannot untangle myself from his vines…
But when he finally set me free
I left a piece of my soul behind.
You cannot have something
And not have it
You cannot feign feelings
To keep someone around.
You cannot hide the truth
To hold on to a lie.
You cannot love someone
and make them cry.
Love is not freedom
It is sacrifice
It is imprisonment
Of one’s selfishness.
It is unconditional kindness
It is wanting someone
Simply for their presence.
Love is not broken promises
Adorned with passionate kisses.
Love is not a flame
Engulfed in a waterfall.
Love is either all in
Or not at all.
So how can you say you love me
But all you want is to be free?